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Restart

from 26% MIXTAPE by B-ahwe

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Anne Lorenz
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lyrics

Come trace the shape of me to you
and the history that unfolds us
holds us villains of our own tales
the most venomous of old souls
misaligned and shrouded
far more complex than unguided
an everyday tragedy
cos we made a broken society
where girls cry naturally but men can’t bare to speak
begs the question of whens it all gunna give.

See I like to fast forward to the end of it
some what prone to invert till I can even speak
to suppress the weight upon me
the baptism of fire that bore loves understanding
complete lack of grounding
push away the bitter thoughts from clear view
focus on the me i bore to pull through
re-adjust to birds eye
anywhere but there i won’t be pulled back

Fast forward to the good part
fast forward to the restart
where i begin.
where the past is laid to rest
no longer weight upon my chest
it’s just a part of me.

Should not wish away the process
so tired of this old mess
self sabotaging dumb I’m a princess
press the past the root of the cause of the evil That bore it
anxiety don’t need no causes
stressing the past
asphyxiates the futures chances

My fire was fuelled
mind was neglected heart abused
done feeding pain with petrol i’m through
show me the route far from these blues
To Breath some hope in these lungs
whilst there’s still any chance
just can’t sit in the pain
Been long enough , wanna run run run.

Knock knock 27 at the door,
truly unsure that i’m able to love,
unfortunate enough to experience the brunt
Of the toxic creations we bred in our sons.
Cold manipulation unrivalled
million rules for me
None for himself
Taught me it was always my fault
Contorted til I didn’t trust my mind
Truth is I was far too innocent
Who could be prepared for such maleficence
Since it seems like I don’t stop running
work so hard, try to move through it but I’m fighting the scars
Living life like it’s already through watching good roll by
Waiting for bad to seek me out pull me down I start again
expecting the worse never questioning change
when will I


Fast forward to the good part
fast forward to the restart
where i begin.
where the past is laid to rest
no longer weight upon my chest
it’s just a part of me.

Wish away the hurt before it starts
wish away the love before it comes
push away all things when they get close
cos i was taught to never trust my tongue
Wish away the hurt before it starts
wish away the love before it comes
push away all things when they get close
i’m too scared I run, run, run.

credits

from 26% MIXTAPE, released November 15, 2023
Written by B-ahwe
Produced by B-ahwe and TAMBALA
Synths by Nicholas Ward
Additional Bass by Cheek Bones Tricky

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B-ahwe London, UK

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